"So, OMG you guys, back when I was famous for that Lizzie Maguire show, I was, like, totally overweight! I mean, I had to wear a size 2. It was, like, so embarassing--the costume lady on the set would be all like, what size do you wear, and I'd have to be like, 2, and she was all like, whatever. It was SO, like, what's that word when you're really embarassed? Oh, I already said that? So one morning I woke up and was looking in myself in the mirror and I was all like, OMG I have to, like, stop eating French fries and lose some weight, and not just a little but a lot so people will really notice me and stop paying attention to that red-headed--I don't even remember her name!. OMG it totally worked, because, like, coke is the new french fry anyway! I think I look SO much hotter than that girl whose name I won't name because I hate that B*****! And she's getting fat again, and I'm not! HAH! That's why I dyed my hair dishwater blonde because SHE WAS TRYING TO LOOK AS HOT AS ME. That's why I hung up on her. But, like, anyway, I just, like, found this necklace on a street corner, and it said 2, and I was like, OMG that's the size I used to be, and I was like, I totally have to wear this necklace ALL THE TIME now so that it will remind not to eat french fries, because being a size 2 is SO not hot at all! Did you hear that, Lindsay?!?!?"