Wednesday, May 03, 2006

Oh, Honey.

It looks like Sienna is up to her usual tricks:

OK. First of all, I don't like her. Second, what is she wearing here? I know the Fug Girls already covered this, but I don't care. Who does this girl think she is? I could tolerate the dress, and the shoes are too adorable for words, and I don't even mind the tights in the dead of winter when it's too cold to even CONSIDER going outside. But altogether? In May? Really.

Also, her hair looks like she's had the mumps for the past five days, and her makeup is dull and uninspired. Maybe she fell asleep under the tanning bed, woke up, realized she had to be at this event in LIKE TEN MINUTES, and just threw on the nearest thing she could find.

Which just happened to be this mess of an outfit. In which case I DON'T EVEN WANT TO KNOW how all these items happened to be on the floor of her room at the same time. Did she wear this to more than ONE event? I want to have faith...but this is Sienna we're talking about. And Audrey Hepburn she is NOT.
Apparently, college professors thing that comparing and contrasting is a useful skill. They sure made me do that a lot. So let's do that. Emmy Rossum is roughly as famous as Sienna Miller. If you don't care about Phantom of the Opera, chances are that you've never seen her before. Well, I DO care about Phantom of the Opera, and I may or may not have the entire soundtrack memorized and own all the sheet music and think Gerard Butler is the hottest thing since Aragorn reclaimed the throne. I'll never tell. Anyway, Emmy Rossum has got this fashion thing DOWN.

Seeeeeeeeee? The hair is nice. The makeup is subtle without being boring or passe. The dress is cute and glitzy without looking like it came from a rummage sale. She's not trying to garner the attention of anyone, but she doesn't go unnoticed either. Also, I love the shoes.
To top it all off there is the smile and the lack of trashy tan to take into consideration. Bottom line?

Sienna Miller: ZERO
Emmy Rossum and anyone else who is about as famous as Sienna (which means not very much): Right, they win. Forever.